A negative topic all the way around but unfortunately it's one that is common in over half of the households in the US according to our textbook. Personally, I knew the pressures of divorce in middle childhood and even now as an adult. My parents threatened divorce every other month since I was in grade school and then finally, once I moved out of the house, my mother filed.
It's very real the pressure the children feel and have intuition on. I think now, my parents underestimated my involvement and my understanding of exactly what was going on. They made the mistake of allowing me to "reffere" some of the larger arguments and I know now that I should have never been involved, and struggle sometimes to keep my arguments with my husband away from my son. It is really a cycle... a vicious cycle to see. Our textbook mentions that children from divorce often find themselves in divorce later in life. I absolutely despise that "stereotype". I think it's onesided and unfair. However, society does think that way -- regardless of if it really has anything to do with if you get a divorce or not.
My husband, tells me that I tend to jump to that when it gets heated... that I may mention the divorce word way before he ever would and he makes me feel like I do this because of what I saw and deal with when it comes to my family. At first, that thought made me angry -- but it makes sense. No matter what the age of the children when their parents get a divorce, it's hard on them. "70% of divorces,...children in these households may have a more diffivult time adjusting to divorce." In rare situations is the life of the child better after divorce. In my case, I have little contact with my father, I see my mother every week, but our relationship is very rocky. It has never been a good, smooth, mother/daughter relationship.... it would be nice, but it's hard to understand sometimes.
It's very real the pressure the children feel and have intuition on. I think now, my parents underestimated my involvement and my understanding of exactly what was going on. They made the mistake of allowing me to "reffere" some of the larger arguments and I know now that I should have never been involved, and struggle sometimes to keep my arguments with my husband away from my son. It is really a cycle... a vicious cycle to see. Our textbook mentions that children from divorce often find themselves in divorce later in life. I absolutely despise that "stereotype". I think it's onesided and unfair. However, society does think that way -- regardless of if it really has anything to do with if you get a divorce or not.
My husband, tells me that I tend to jump to that when it gets heated... that I may mention the divorce word way before he ever would and he makes me feel like I do this because of what I saw and deal with when it comes to my family. At first, that thought made me angry -- but it makes sense. No matter what the age of the children when their parents get a divorce, it's hard on them. "70% of divorces,...children in these households may have a more diffivult time adjusting to divorce." In rare situations is the life of the child better after divorce. In my case, I have little contact with my father, I see my mother every week, but our relationship is very rocky. It has never been a good, smooth, mother/daughter relationship.... it would be nice, but it's hard to understand sometimes.
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